Okay so I literally turned 21 yesterday and thought that a birthday blog would be appropriate. Yesterday was quite possibly the best birthday I have ever had. My friends took the time and to throw a little party for me, buying balloons and party snacks. It sounds a little cheesy but it in fact it was really sweet. To top this off they made sure I was the drunkest I have ever been in my life (at a club we went to later), bought me a few small presents and they gave me card.
Now although the card might not seem that interesting, it is what is written with in the card that spoke to me as I was reading. Instead of generic comments they were all incredibly personal and meaningful. My friend Tom literally wrote "You're the best guy I know". That line has really touched me as it feels genuine. It's made me think about all the different experiences I've shared and had with the people I have met at uni both the bad and good. It's certainly a different experience than what I have had with friends from the past, I feel like my university friends have changed me and I've become a better person for it. I'm more open, I'm more knowledgeable and I'm simply just a happier person. I'm starting to realise what I want, what I want rid of and what's now important to me and what I actually should be worrying about. I feel like I know me better. I've been sat reading through my livejournal posts that date from the age of 17 to 20 and I can't help smile or laugh about some of the things I say or talk about. However with other things I'm starting to see a pattern:
It was always reassuring when the plan was straight forward for the next few years yet the connection between college and uni feels so slim right now that it makes me feel rather uneasy about the next 3 years of my life. Though I panic and I worry about not passing my course I guess I should see it as some sort of adventure...the first time in 18 years were I'm uncertain where things are generally going.
To me what I've just written sounds like I'm about to give it all up yet I'm really not, I'll keep pushing until the very end of my college course as i'm not planning to let things simply just go down the toilet, I've worked hard today, doing hard work that I love to do. Making film. And I plan to continue doing this at a uni this coming September. -MAY. 30TH, 2008
I've recently been reading through the entries of just before I came to Leeds to start university and simply by reading them I can see how worried I was about the change that was about to happen. Now at the age 21 I'm in the same boat but apparently on a larger scale. Upon till recently I would agreed with the whole idea of worrying but over the past couple of days I've realised there is no need to worry. Now, when I say this I do not simply mean don't worry. I mean it in the sense that it's just the same feeling as before, life is unpredictable and who knows what will happen? Just like I had no idea with the whole prospect of coming to university. From reading that entry I can tell that I was passionate about film making and I still agree with that statement now. I won't ever give up.
The idea of turning 21 has made a lot of thoughts and notions settle on my mind like snow. Everything seems to becoming clear. So instead of writing an entry of how the future is uncertain and how worrying that is, I'll say this instead "The future is an unclear excitement waiting to happen."
Now although the card might not seem that interesting, it is what is written with in the card that spoke to me as I was reading. Instead of generic comments they were all incredibly personal and meaningful. My friend Tom literally wrote "You're the best guy I know". That line has really touched me as it feels genuine. It's made me think about all the different experiences I've shared and had with the people I have met at uni both the bad and good. It's certainly a different experience than what I have had with friends from the past, I feel like my university friends have changed me and I've become a better person for it. I'm more open, I'm more knowledgeable and I'm simply just a happier person. I'm starting to realise what I want, what I want rid of and what's now important to me and what I actually should be worrying about. I feel like I know me better. I've been sat reading through my livejournal posts that date from the age of 17 to 20 and I can't help smile or laugh about some of the things I say or talk about. However with other things I'm starting to see a pattern:
It was always reassuring when the plan was straight forward for the next few years yet the connection between college and uni feels so slim right now that it makes me feel rather uneasy about the next 3 years of my life. Though I panic and I worry about not passing my course I guess I should see it as some sort of adventure...the first time in 18 years were I'm uncertain where things are generally going.
To me what I've just written sounds like I'm about to give it all up yet I'm really not, I'll keep pushing until the very end of my college course as i'm not planning to let things simply just go down the toilet, I've worked hard today, doing hard work that I love to do. Making film. And I plan to continue doing this at a uni this coming September. -MAY. 30TH, 2008
I've recently been reading through the entries of just before I came to Leeds to start university and simply by reading them I can see how worried I was about the change that was about to happen. Now at the age 21 I'm in the same boat but apparently on a larger scale. Upon till recently I would agreed with the whole idea of worrying but over the past couple of days I've realised there is no need to worry. Now, when I say this I do not simply mean don't worry. I mean it in the sense that it's just the same feeling as before, life is unpredictable and who knows what will happen? Just like I had no idea with the whole prospect of coming to university. From reading that entry I can tell that I was passionate about film making and I still agree with that statement now. I won't ever give up.
The idea of turning 21 has made a lot of thoughts and notions settle on my mind like snow. Everything seems to becoming clear. So instead of writing an entry of how the future is uncertain and how worrying that is, I'll say this instead "The future is an unclear excitement waiting to happen."
Im glad you enjoyed your birthday Strawberry. We are all in a funny old place right now aren't we. I know though that, however uncertain, the next 3 years are we will have a bloody good time experiencing them.
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