Life begins again.

      I'm now back at uni and some form of life seems to be reappearing. As much as I loved being home at Christmas its nice to come back and make a start at being busy again. As well as being busy its nice to have money seeing as I lived  literally in poverty for almost two years, coming out of that now is great. I'm at a point now where its a case of not got too much but not got too little amount, I can survive.
      Things seem to be looking up and I'm very happy about it. I don't want to jinx it but I'm pretty sure this is going to be a much better financial year and a good year in general.

The values we take for granted.

Today I went to a funeral. As we all know these are never the nicest of events and today was no exception.
I wasn't very close to the person that had past on but I have a list of situations where we have ended up crossing each others paths. The funeral was of a young man, he died at the tender age of seventeen.

I remember standing listening to the speeches of what he had achieved and how he had done so much in his short life and I remember looking around the room and watching peoples eyes fill up with tears whilst mine remained dry. I then saw the boys mum and all at once I could not help but feel over whelmed with emotion. I thought back to the age of 13 when I myself lost a close friend and began remembering everything all over again.

I remembered how difficult it was and I kept thinking he would be returning to school the next day which of course was never going to happen. After the funeral my parents drove over to where the wake was being held, I saw people I knew and people I had never met all hugging and comforting each other and then I saw the slide show of  the boys photos being displayed on a screen.

My emotions took over me and away from where I was. All I could think about was how unfair the world is to those that don't deserve it to be at all. I couldn't help but think about how his family must feel and how although today has been a statement of saying good bye they will not be saying that for a very long time. It made me think about how it will change their lives and how ever hard they try they will never be the same.

After thinking all these things I found it very hard to talk to anyone or listen to what they were saying because all I could think about was relating my similar experience with theirs. I came home and couldn't hold back tears any longer, I was sad. Sad for his family, sad for something they will never be able to replace. Today has influenced me and made me realise how important both life and death are, how much I value my friends and family that I have around me and how lucky I and many other people are to have these things.

R.I.P Greg, although you are gone from this earth I know you will never be forgotten.

Hoping for reality.

Today I did nothing or so it felt like I did nothing but in actual fact I may have done more for my future than I have in the past couple of weeks as today I applied for a job via the BBC. I spent last night concentrating on finishing of what I consider to be "my real CV" and not some half arsed one that I use when applying for part time jobs. To be honest I'm pretty proud of it and although I'll probably never mention that to anyone ever in person I can happily shout it out for the world to hear (or rather read) online, that is of course if anyone is listening.

      After completing the CV I decided to scan the BBC website for jobs and after flicking through a couple of pages and reading a few job descriptions I decided to call it a night. I lay there thinking about how one of those jobs could change my life around completely and as I drifted off to sleep I began to dream of what it might be like to be living that life.

  This morning I woke up determined to make that dream a reality. I went on to the BBC site and hit the apply button and then after a good 3 hours I had applied and sent off my application form.   

       Now in an ideal world I'd magically get this job and would be able to start thinking what I would need to change but unfortunately I don't have a time machine and can't put all my eggs in to one basket. However, here's to hoping.

I dreamed a dream.

Long ago at the young age of sixteen, I sat down one day with a course guide to a college called West Notts. After scanning over pages of courses and circling ones over others, I picked a course. I decided I wanted to be a film maker.

   For two years I studied media and the moving image learning all about film and TV and the various content that was used within these mediums. Eventually it was time for college too end and so from here I went on to University where I studied film and moving image production at the Northern Film School, Leeds Met which included moving to Leeds.

   I arrived and began creating a new life for myself, building friendships and bonds with people from across the country. Being at University gave me chances to see the world, have amazing experiences and meet a bunch of people I would never be without. However once again comes the time to move on but this time there is a big question I have to ask myself.


"What happens now?"

   My name is Dan. I'm 20 years old and this year, I will be leaving university. Like many other people I feel there seems to be nothing beyond finishing uni except a big black hole of nothingness. Unlike when making decisions before, there seems to be no guidelines when considering what to do next. The big bad world is just a few months away and to be honest I am terrified. 

   I have decided to begin this blog to document the real beginning of my life. My life in the big bad world.


2011 will certainly be an interesting year.